For those of you unconcerned with important national events or who have been living in the dark following the freak October northeastern snow storm, you may be shocked to learn that Kim Kardashian has filed for divorce just 72 days after her ballyhooed wedding to NBA star (?) Kris Humphries!  Any long-term impacts on world financial markets have not yet been revealed.

Having made millions on the broadcast rights and raked in a considerable amount in wedding gifts, Kim has decided to donate a comparatively paltry $200 thousand from her haul to the Dream Foundation.  Having taken in almost $18 million from the wedding and paid zero (that’s right, everything from the invitations to the gowns and reception were provided gratis for this made-for-cable-TV wedding), Kim’s magnanimity to the poor ranks slightly below that of Bernie Madoff.

In addition, Kim intends keeping the 20.5 carat diamond ring valued at nearly $2 million that her ex-hubby Humphries gave her at the time of their engagement!  Perhaps, Kris didn’t pay for that either.

Kim is the daughter of attorney and music producer, the late Robert Kardashian who unlike Kim actually earned his money.  Marital infidelity by Kim’s mom, Kris, led to the divorce of her birth parents.  Eventually, Kris hooked another sap, former Olympian Bruce Jenner.

Kim partied through her young adulthood on the LA socialite circuit with close lifelong friend Paris Hilton (as they say, birds of a feather flock together).  She married music producer Damon Thomas in 2000 and divorced him in 2004.  Now a two-time loser at marriage, Kim’s public persona skyrocketed in 2007 with the release of a home sex video featuring Kim and R&B singer Ray J (the Kardashian women know what the public wants).

 If you’re still reading this article, you’re probably wondering about the nature of the society in which we live, a culture in which the average American is descending into poverty while those with low moral and ethical standards, like Kim Kardashian, Lindsay Lohan, and Charlie Sheen, laugh all the way to the bank.

This cult of personality and societal preoccupation with the lewd, lascivious, shocking, and just plain bizarre is another indication of the demise of our country and the world.  While it is human nature to stare at a train wreck or natural disaster, it is utter foolishness to pay to do so.  Yet, if you watch cable or satellite television or, God forbid, purchase a product endorsed or sold by one of these so-called celebrities (what is it we’re celebrating?), you are supporting their hedonistic lifestyles.

So, stop reading this article!  Cancel your cable or satellite subscription!  And, boycott all products endorsed or sold by those who reap riches at the expense of the morons whose lives are so devoid of stimulation or purpose that they actually care about the life of Kim Kardashian or any other celebrity! 

Down through the ages, men have forsaken their possessions, ideals, and nobility for lust.  The David who slew the mighty giant was felled by Bathsheba; Antony’s heart was enslaved to Cleopatra.  The long list of horny toads continues until the present day.  It includes such clods as former New York Governor Spitzer, actor Charlie Sheen, and the Uncrowned King of All Cheaters, Tiger Woods.

When harmless flirtations grow into uncontrollable desires, a man’s logic flies out the window, leaving temporary or permanent insanity in its wake.  Men of wealth and power, including heads of State, act upon the credo that “to the victor go the spoils.”  But men in lower economic strata are just as guilty as their more fortunate brethren of sticking their … noses … where they don’t belong.  So why do they do it?  Why risk everything for instant gratification?

Obviously, physical attraction plays a role in a man’s infidelity.  Loneliness and unhappiness with one’s current mate are also contributing factors.  But the fallout is profound, for women are equipped with radar far keener than ours.  Just ask any teenager who, from hard experience, knows that his mother has eyes in the back of her head.  Women never fail to read the warning signs of a cheater.  These are not limited to excuses for not showing up on holidays or other special occasions, a sudden inclination to work out at the gym, or the urge to touch up their grays with Just for Men.

Once nailed, married players can lose their wives, their children, and depending upon which States they call home, their property.  On top of this comes the legal necessity to shell out alimony and child support.  Single men who step out risk losing their original partners and compromising their new (cheating) relationships.   But not even these potentialities stop them from sleeping around.

While the most intelligent minds of our society have failed to uncover the reason that men cheat, a fictional character in the movie Moonstruck may have provided the answer.  In the film, Mrs. Castorini, played by Olympia Dukakis, asked  Johnny Cammareri (Danny Aiello) why men need more than one woman.  Johnny explained, “When God made woman, he took a rib from Adam and made Eve.  That left a big hole where that rib was, and man would never feel complete until he got it back.”  Mrs. Castori then asked, “Why then, would a man need more than one woman?”  His response was “I don’t know.  Maybe it’s because he fears death.”  She cracked, “That’s it?  Thank you for answering my question!”

Although Dukakis’ character was frustrated by this answer, Aiello’s character may have hit upon the underlying cause of male fidelity.  If men are afraid of dying, they want to leave something behind them, something that is truly theirs.  And nothing says “truly theirs” as much as a child.  So if one child fits the bill, imagine the benefits of multiple children.   Since women usually carry one child at a time, the wider the farmland, so to speak, in which a man sows his oats, the more children he’s likely to produce.  They may not carry his name, but they will carry his genes: that which makes him unique.   So.  Is it fear, after all, or is it ego that compels us to cheat?

And if it is fear or ego that drives men, what does this say about women?

Does it suggest that women are stronger than us, emotionally stronger?  I think it does.  Women carry, birth, and for the most part, rear the babies; no small feat.  If the ladies do their job well, the babies grow up to propagate our species.  Therefore, as in the animal kingdom, females have to be stronger, faster, and smarter than males.  Our very survival depends upon this.

If women are stronger, faster, and smarter than we are, why do they put up with us at all?   Are they, in the final analysis, just baby-making machines?  And is this why we cheat: to search for some meaning to our lives beyond our biology?  If man is the most intelligent creature on the planet, why do we emulate the hamster on the ever-spinning wheel?  Why do we run in place, make the same mistakes over and over again, and alienate the most beautiful and desirable thing that God ever created: woman?