72 degrees and a cloudless, deep blue sky is a recipe for a beautiful day.  And, I believe that almost everyone would enjoy and attempt to make the most of just such a day – whether their diversions be barbecuing, picnicking, hiking, boating, participating in a sporting activity, or just relaxing.  It’s easy and natural to feel good and delight in whatever one does on this perfect type of day.

Effortless also is our inclination to revel in success, our own and also that of those about whom we care.  In fact, successful people always seem to have a coterie of well-wishers and admirers surrounding them.  No favor is too big nor task too large nor accommodation too peculiar to be provided for their benefit.  But, what can be said of the plight of those not successful; in particular, those whose problems or illnesses cast them outside of the social mainstream?

How often have we witnessed the plight of the proverbial “black sheep” or social pariah.  Such unfortunate individuals appear to be a part of most groups, organizations, and families.  Cast aside by those closest to them, they experience a form of social death.  Whether deserved or undeserved, gossip, speculation, rumor, and innuendo about such individuals abound.  At gatherings, false smiles and civility greet them while furtive glances and hushed tones belie the thoughts and conversations of those around them.

The psychological impact of the isolation by family, friends, and others upon whom these individuals have come to rely is incalculable.  And, the reason, I believe, for such isolation rests with the egos of those who may have formerly have been considered supporters.  Whether driven by jealousy, embarrassment, or fear, those formerly providing support now dissociate because their primary concern is how they will be perceived by others.  Fleeing the purported stigma of the “pariah,” they demonstrate their own weakness and insecurity.

During the pre-Christian period of the Roman Republic, Quintus Ennius, considered the father of Roman poetry, wrote that “a sure friend is known in difficulty” to express the fact that one realizes his true friends and family when in the midst of dire need.  In English, this is often expressed as “a friend in need is a friend indeed.”

Conversely, if you want to be a “true” friend, cultivate the loyalty, character, and courage you will require to unreservedly provide assistance and support to those in need, regardless of your personal assessment of their situations and the opinions of others.  A person of substance and integrity does not require “fair weather” to be a friend.